Not At All Impressed
by Sarah1281
Summary: When the Templar Aeife comes to take Anders back to the Circle for the fourth time, he is decidedly not impressed and, to her great annoyance, decides to rate her efforts to bring him back.


Not At All Impressed

Disclaimer: I do not own Dragon Age.

Note: The prompt was Anders rating the Templar who came to take him in.

When Aeife showed up at the tavern she had finally managed to track the Circle Tower's biggest flight risk to, Anders looked less than impressed. He was wearing a reasonably convincing fake beard and mustache and clad in the clothes of a commoner while surrounded by _four_ very attractive women – one of them an elf even – who were giggling flirtatiously and eying the escaped mage in a downright indecent manner.

"I ordered you a drink," Anders told her, nodding towards a mug of ale. "Of course, you took so long that it's probably warm by now so you might want to get a fresh one."

Aeife raised an eyebrow as she cleansed the area around Anders. This was hardly the first time she had been sent after Anders. In fact, she had been there for each of his escape attempts so this made it her fourth time tracking the blonde attempted apostate down. One would think that since he clearly had no regard for the Circle and showed no signs of agreeing to stay put that he would just be executed by now but apparently he couldn't be made Tranquil since he had passed his Harrowing and he was so vociferously anti-blood magic that the Greagoir and the other high-ranking Templars were unwilling to have him executed as a maleficar. Some of the other Templars suggested that she just kill him herself and claim that it was unavoidable but he always surrendered – reluctantly, of course, but sensibly – whenever they caught up to him and so to kill him would be outright murder and she didn't want his completely unnecessary death on her conscience. Even if he did feel the need to blatantly flirt with her in blatant disregard for her Templar oaths of chastity. "You were waiting for me? If you knew I was coming I would have thought you'd take the opportunity to flee."

Anders shrugged. "I would have but I knew I would never be able to get out of the city before you caught up to me and this place has the best ale in town." He flashed a smile at one of the girls. "Not to mention the _best_ company by far. I've got to say, I am rather disappointed in you, dear Aeife."

She pointed ignored the endearment. "Oh really? Why would that be? If anything, the fact that you've escaped **again **is cause for me to be disappointed in you. Greagoir and Irving have been talking about putting you in solitary confinement, you know. Sure, it's a waste of resources but not quite as much of a waste as your chronic escape attempts are beginning to be."

Anders held up his hands. "My dear lady, I would _love_ to stop escaping from the Tower, I really would."

"Really," Aeife said skeptically.

"Oh yes," Anders said earnestly. "And the minute I stop being placed back in a situation that warrants escaping, I will gladly cease and desist."

"You know the law, Anders," Aeife told him bluntly. "You're a mage and, as such, must remain in the Tower when not given permission to leave it."

"Is it really _my _fault if no one ever seems inclined to grant me 'permission' for the same basic freedom that literally everybody that the Chantry isn't enslaving takes for granted?" Anders demanded.

"Yes," Aeife replied promptly. "You keep escaping so no one can trust you. And we're not 'enslaving' you. It's for your own good as well as everyone else's. Mages are dangerous when untrained or unwatched and well-meaning but misinformed commoners can…react badly to the discovery of a mage."

"You never think for yourself, do you?" Anders said, shaking his head pityingly. "It's lucky that you're gorgeous or I would be much more put-out by our association. And to answer your question, I'm disappointed with your performance here."

Aeife narrowed her eyes. She knew that she was considered very attractive with her long dark hair and bright blue eyes but that didn't matter in the slightest as she was a Templar and had no need to attract anyone, let alone a particularly troublesome mage. "My performance? What do you mean?"

"Well, you've come here alone, for one thing," Anders pointed out.

"One Templar is all that there need be to shut down a mage," Aeife countered.

Anders shook his head. "You don't know that. What if I managed to get some supporters? It's been nearly a month since I got out after all. If it were another mage then you might be able to shut them down as well but there's no guarantee that you could be quick enough or that I wouldn't have non-mage backup."

"You don't appear to," Aeife said confidently after surreptitiously checking the other people in the tavern.

"Well, no," Anders admitted. "But that doesn't make your failure to be prepared for that possibility any less negligent. And then, of course, there's always the chance that I'll have learned how to fight sans magic and so instead of being my worst nightmare you'll just be a girl with a sword."

"A girl who has trained for _years_ with a sword," Aeife shot back. "As compared to the mere weeks of instruction you could have possibly received."

"There is that, I suppose," Anders conceded. "But I could get lucky or be some kind of prodigy so you still lose points for that."

"Points?" Aeife repeated incredulously. "What, is this some sort of examination now?"

To her surprise, Anders nodded. "As someone who has now been apprehended by Templars four times, I would consider myself something of an expert on procedure right now. Comparing this performance to my previous experiences…well, it's just not looking very good for you."

"Because you _could_ have done two different things that you clearly didn't?" Aeife asked dubiously.

"There's that," Anders confirmed, "and while they may not actually be the case – this time – that doesn't mean they weren't still possibilities so you still lose some points. Every little bit counts. Then, of course, there is the fact that you took almost a month to find me. I could be halfway to Par Vollen by this point."

Aeife smirked at him. "You want to go to Par Vollen? Make my day. I hear they keep their mages tongue-less and on leashes there."

Anders quickly rallied. "The Tevinter then."

"I could find you even there," Aeife said a little threateningly.

Anders grinned at her. "See! You _do_ care! Although I've got to say, allowing me to waste all this time instead of immediately taking me in…just think of all the opportunities I had to escape."

"You didn't take them so they're moot," Aeife said flatly.

"Still, it's very sloppy, Aeife dear, and you need to be more careful or a big bad apostate might take advantage of that kind of opening one day and then who knows what will happen?" Anders said, his eyes theatrically wide.

"Good point," Aeife told him, holding out an arm. "Let's go."

"Finally getting around to this part huh?" Anders asked as his wrists were bound together. "It's a bit too late to try and salvage the situation, isn't it? You're still only getting a six."

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